Dominación do mundo

De Desgalipedia
(Redirixido desde "Dominar o mundo")

A dominación do mundo, conquista do mundo ou dominación mundial é un obxectivo ambicioso que se pode anhelado en ser alcanzado por un goberno, unha ideoloxía, unha crenza ou unha persoa, xeralmente buscando adquirir control político total do planeta enteiro.

A pesar da posibilidade de que un planeta tan complexo e diverso como a Terra pode ser "dominado" por unha única unidade ser pouco probable, o concepto de dominación mundial hai moito tempo é un tema atopar en moitas ocasións na historia e na ficción.

Historia[editar]

Orixes da Dominación do Mundo[editar]

De volta ao día, dinosauros eran moi frío. Farían o que precisaba ser feito, pero non máis. E á noite, eles soltar e saír cos seus Bros. Os dinosauros europeos gozar dunha boa botella de coñac antes de xogar un partido de cricket. Os dinosauros africanos ía tomar unha batida de un bong logo deixar as súas noivas recén impregnados. Asiáticos dinosauros ía comer arroz e construír unha merda.

But the North American dinosaurs partied to the extreme. One night, about 65 million years ago, some of the Mexican dinosaurs got a little too drunk on tequila and drunk dialed a meteor. After pre-gaming with the Moon, the meteor literally crashed the party, killing most of the land-based life on Earth. In the morning, the meteor had released that he had become the Father of World Domination. Albeit hungover, he knew to get his ass outta there, before the World demanded child support.

The Human Quest Begins[editar]

Every since man has been able to use fire, he has sought to conquer and dominate over everything in existence. The earliest evidence of this is when Caveman Napoleon's Invasion of Russia actually went a little too far and he and his army arrived in Alaska.

Interesting enough, this would be known as the last French military victory.

However, in earlier times, humans only had rocks. So man worked feverishly to develop new weapons to fuck up other people's shit. Spears and bows and arrows soon became the fashionable implement of death. Prada and Dolce and Gabbana became the industry leaders of high-fashion weaponry. However, this article does not recognize Domination of the Fashion Industry, because that's sorta fruity.

The Human Quest Falters[editar]

Unfortunately for would-be world dictators, Ganondorf found the Triforce and the world went to Hell. This led to a time of insecurity among most of Europe's citizens. After Italy discovered the hidden power of Viagra, a good majority of the insecurity faded away. However, based on what they had seen in Africa, several powerful European countries, such as Portugal, Spain, the Mushroom Kingdom, and Narnia, began sailing the oceans looking plastic surgeons. Oh, and the Hero of Time did something.

After Spain, and later the United Kingdom found the Master Sword, it was game over for the world. Spaniards ravished the New World with biological warfare, like Small Pox and Pauly Shore movies. The United Kingdom got Spain's sloppy seconds in the New World, but it managed to get both India's and South Africa's V-card. Nice, dude.

Non hai maior exemplo de Dominación Mundial que Estados Unidos. Un país bastante novo que quere ser grande e que xa acabou co Xapón durante a Segunda Guerra Mundial. Quere roubar o petróleo de Iraq e dixo que estaba atrás de Osama Bin Laden para matalo. Ademais, tivo como presidente por 8 anos, George W. Bush un dos descendentes tolos de Adolf Hitler. Estados Unidos dominan o mundo coa Mc Donald's, Microsoft, Facebook e Twitter.